I don’t know if there’s a word for how I feel. Love seems much too mild. This feeling is too strong, wild, potent and forceful. Too metal. I imagine this is how serial killers feel when they’re locked in on a target, how a heart attack feels when it yanks your breath away, how Christians feel when they’re feeling God-like power touch them.
This is the feeling I get sometimes when I’m just this fiercely obsessed about something. Almost…angry? I don’t know why. It’s the aggressive urge you get when you see an obscenely cute puppy and you just want to squeeze it to death.
This is how I’m currently feeling about Extreme’s music. The genius lyrics, melody, harmony, vocals and awesome musicality. From an era where musicians wrote magic because there were just no rules about what makes a hit song.
Obsessed with the entire Pornograffiti album. Start with these: Hole Hearted. Decadence Dance. Get the Funk Out. Play with Me. I’d list the entire album if you’d let me, but only because I wish you knew there’s so much more to Extreme than More than Words, even if it is a great song (made more amazing by Nuno’s harmony and Paul Gilbert in this video).
Three years ago I went to Japan to watch Mr Big live in concert with Clif, major Mr Big and Paul Gilbert fanboy.
I knew 3 songs at that concert.
The first non-Wild World/To Be With You/Just Take My Heart song I really enjoyed was Green Tinted Sixties Mind, which I heard over the speakers as “365”. We were in the corner seats near the stage and the speakers were muffled. Very confusing.
Me (after concert): I like that song! 365.
Me: 365! It goes like *hums tune* THREE HUNDRED SIXTY FIVEEEEEE.
Clif: There’s no song like that.
Also got hooked onto Queen, and Extreme. Now feeling sad I missed a whole era of music and concerts.
But I’ve since been to two other Mr Big shows, added a lot more songs to playlist and learnt more about their career by reading old interviews.
So it was sad to learn that Pat Torpey died today.
And it was sad to think of how underrated they are. So here’s a nice, pretty radio friendly song about the peak of their career. Enjoy.
Since I’ve fixed up my Google account and have proper access to YouTube now, I thought I’d make use of its features. Now, this here is the kind of music I daydream to, and the kind of music I’d love to die to. ‘Songs to die to’ was the title of this post until I realised there might be people who might paint a depressing and morbid picture of me.
To elaborate on how un-morbid and un-depressed I am and paint the dream-like sequence that goes through my head when I picture death, I’ll refer you to the ending scene of one of my favourite movies. More dreamy than gruesome, and completely unrealistic.
In any case, Sigur Ros’ Hoppípolla at the top of the list of songs I would love to go to sleep with forever. If I ever meet with an untimely death, I trust you know what to do.
Music goes much deeper than anything else. I once said that I have a love/hate relationship with it, and I truly believe it. There is a lot of grief in music, a lot of pain. There isn’t just one emotion in each song, good music confuses you. It brings so much depth and emotion with it, there’s usually a conflict within you as you listen to it play.
That internal struggle frustrates me. It makes me want to sing along, it makes me want to cry. But what do you do when you can’t hit the notes? What do you do when you can’t sing it out? It gets even more exasperating, the inner turmoil grows.
I am currently obsessed with Andrew Lloyd Webber’s The Phantom of the Opera at the Royal Albert Hall, and I’ve watched it almost six times now in three days on DVD. Yes, it is still playing now as I type this out. Ramin Karimloo has the most achingly beautiful voice and when he is acting as The Phantom, easily translates into an awe-inspiring mix of emotion. Just so much emotion, so much energy.
I hate it. I hate it because it is so gorgeous it makes me want to kill myself. Indeed I hate it because it’s so beautiful.
There are some songs that bring you back in time. Like how sometimes the smell of some things brings back vivid memories, there are some songs that do the same. An out of body experience that isn’t alien, every sensation flowing through your brain to the tips of your fingers just acutely familiar. And it is eerie as it is lovely that I remember how everything used to be, and I remember what I was fighting for, what I was living for, and what I was dying for.
They were tears now remembered fondly of.
Those were the times I was most alive.